Bobbie's Beat: Heavens above

© 2018-Newport News Times

Not long ago, I wrote about my lifelong belief in angels. Almost every column brings in mail from readers, and occasionally, I need to apologize for not answering. If I could, I would, and I beg you to not take it personally. My vision can’t keep up, and neither can my energy. Enough with the excuses.

The angel column drew more mail than expected. To my delight, many of you believe in angels and shared your stories, but not your permission to put your stories in print.                  

Then a new reader sent a day brightener I had never seen before, so now you get to see it, too. The reader said a Sunday School teacher at her church asked the children to share their thoughts about angels. Here goes with answers from the kids:

  • It’s not easy to become an angel. First you die. Then you go to Heaven, and then there is still the flight training to go through. And then you got to agree to wear those angel clothes. — Matthew, age 6
  • Angels work for God and watch over kids when God has to go do something else. — Mitchell, age 7
  • I only know the names of two angels, Hark and Harold. — Gregory, age 5
  • Everybody’s got it all wrong. Angels don’t wear halos anymore. I forget why, but scientists are working on it. — Olive, age 9
  • My guardian angel helps me with math, but he’s not much good for science. — Henry, age 8
  • Angels don’t eat, but they drink milk from Holy Cows. — Jack, age 6
  • Angels talk all the way when they are flying you up to Heaven. The main subject is where you went wrong before you got dead. — Daniel, age 8
  • When an angel gets mad, he takes a deep breath. When he lets out his breath again, somewhere there’s a tornado. — Reagan, age 10
  • Angels live in cloud houses made by God and his Son, who’s a very good carpenter. — Jared, age 8
  • All angels are girls because they gotta wear dresses, and boys don’t go for it. — Antonio, age 9
  • What I don’t get about angels is why, when someone is in love, they shoot arrows at them. — Sarah, age 7
  • Some of the angels are in charge of helping heal sick animals and pets. And if they don’t make the animals get better, they help the child get over it. — Vicki, age 8
  • My angel is my grandma, who died last year. She got a big head start on helping me while she was still down here on earth. — Ashley, age 9
  • ••

Just when I thought that was it for this week, an email popped in from my high school friend, Teresa, who sends the best stuff. It’s funny and sort of angel-related. Here it is.

  • ••

A delightful angelic little boy was waiting for his mother outside the ladies room of the gas station. As he stood there, he was approached by a man who asked, "Sonny, can you tell me where the post office is?" The little boy replied, "Sure! Just go straight down this street two blocks and turn to your right. It's on the left."

 The man thanked the boy kindly, complimented him on how bright he was and said, "I'm the new pastor in town. If you and your mommy come to church on Sunday, I'll show you how to get to Heaven."

 The little boy replied with a chuckle; "You're kidding me, right? You can't even find the post office."

 

Bobbie Lippman is a professional writer who lives in Seal Rock with Bentley, her joint-custody dog. She is the author of “Good Grief: A Collection of Stories As One Woman Journeys From Heartbreak To Healing Through Honesty and Humor” (Dancing Moon Press). The book (with all proceeds going to Rotary International) is available at JC Market in Newport and directly from Bobbie, who can be contacted at [email protected]


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