I didn’t expect such a reaction from readers after last week’s column came out, but the message obviously struck such an emotional chord that people, including guys, wrote to say it made them cry. So this week let’s step it up a little and I promise the final day brightener will leave you laughing.
I dug into a file called “Material from Readers” and here’s a little gem from Martha Wenger of Waldport:
IT’S THE DOOR!
Do you ever walk into a room with some purpose in mind only to completely forget what the purpose was? Turns out doors themselves are to blame for the strange memory lapses. Psychologists at the University of Notre Dame discovered that passing through a doorway triggers what is known as an “event boundary” in the mind, separating one set of thoughts and memories from the next. Your brain files away the thoughts you had in the previous room and prepares a blank slate for the new locale. Whew! It’s not aging, it’s the darn door! Thank goodness for studies!
From Jackie Anderson, Seal Rock
1. Once upon a time there was this little village that had been suffering from drought for a very long time. Their minister decided that next Sunday would be devoted to everyone praying for rain. On that Sunday the minister looked down on his congregation and asked this question: “If you brought an umbrella please raise your hand.” Only one little boy raised his hand and held up his umbrella. That's FAITH.
2. Every night we go to bed without any assurance of being alive the next morning, but still we set our alarms to wake up. That's HOPE.
3. We plan big things for tomorrow in spite of zero knowledge of the future. That's CONFIDENCE.
4. We see the world suffering but still we get married and have children. That's LOVE.
5. On an old man's shirt was written a sentence: "I am 60 years old … I am sweet 16 with 44 years of experience. That’s ATTITUDE.
Teresa Cavanaugh, Omaha, Nebraska. Teresa and I have been friends since high school. Now that we are (ahem) older, she seems to be sending more stuff on aging. Here we go:
Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me! I want people to know why I look like this. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.
The older we get the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable. o ignored
Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it. This is so true. I love to hear people say, "You don't look that old!"
First you forget names, then you forget faces. Then you forget to pull up your zipper. But it's worse when you forget to pull it down.
Two guys, one old, one young, are pushing their carts around Walmart when they collide. The old guy says to the young guy, "Sorry about that. I'm looking for my wife and I guess I wasn't paying attention to where I was going." The young guy says, "That's OK, it's a coincidence. I'm looking for my wife, too. I can't find her and I'm getting a little desperate." The old guy says, “Maybe I can help you find her, what does she look like?" The young guy says, "Well she's 27 years old, tall, with red hair, blue eyes, very buxom, no bra, long legs and she's wearing short shorts. What does your wife look like?" To which the old guy says, "It doesn't matter. Let's look for yours."
Thanks to Martha Wenger, Jackie Anderson and Teresa Cavanaugh for your contributions today. I’m still laughing about the two guys in Wal-Mart.
Bobbie Lippman is a professional writer who lives in Seal Rock with her cat, Keeper, and her robot, Waldo. She is the author of “Good Grief: A Collection of Stories As One Woman Journeys From Heartbreak To Healing Through Honesty and Humor” (Dancing Moon Press). Bobbie can be contacted at email@example.com
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